What’s In a Relationship

The Winnipeg Police Service has replaced its longstanding motto, Community Commitment with “Building Relationships“.

The following are some comments that I’ve heard about the Winnipeg Police “Building Relationships” motto that add some humour to an otherwise serious subject.

Scenario 1

Upon being arrested and placed in the back of a patrol unit a suspect was heard to say “I don’t like where this relationship is going“.

Scenario 2

In June of last year a suspect attempted to end his relationship with police when he escaped from a holding room in the District 6 Police Station. The relationship was rekindled when police re-arrested the suspect.

Scenario 3

Another suspect thought his relationship with police was going sour. Police managed to spice up the relationship with a long burst of pepper spray.

Scenario 4

A recently tasered inner city resident described his relationship with the Police Service as “electrifying“.

Scenario 5

The Professional Standards Unit, formerly known as the Internal Investigation Unit, could also be called the Failed Relationships Unit.

Scenario 6

One recently convicted gang member doing time at Stony Mountain Penitentiary described his relationship with police as “rocky“.

Scenario 7

Now that the Winnipeg Police Service has entered the relationship building business, eHarmony, the online dating service, will no doubt respond to this encroachment by changing its motto to “To Serve and Protect“.

Scenario 8

One repeat criminal offender described his relationship with police as “ long-term and on going“.

If you think policing business should be strictly ‘business’, lighten up. There is a lot of humour in policing. As one former Chief often said ‘you need to get a least one good laugh a day”.

4 comments on “What’s In a Relationship”

Chris Burrows says:

2012/01/21 at 13:09

Well this was a great post and had Sel and I giggling. I think we would have to move into the Failed Relationship Dept. I actually mentioned in my enraged emails to WPS after Sel was taken to IPDA, that maybe the latest Motto should include something about it being a positive relationship.
Chris

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McLeod says:

2012/01/21 at 13:17

When the officers from the Auto-theft Suppression Strategy (WATSS) came knocking at 1 a.m. doing a curfew check, I knew it was jealousy. They were making sure I wasn’t building a relationship with someone else.

When the Green Team came by with TST, it’s because they heard there was a party. And they weren’t invited.

When the K9 doggie tracked me down, it’s because I was playing hard-to-get.

But not all relationships with the WPS are so benign. They’ve been known to take photographs of those they wish to build relationships with — people allegedly doing very naughty things, like driving 6km/h over the posted speed on Grant Ave. They demand money. If you don’t pay the extortion fee, others will soon know of your aberrant behavior. Naughty pictures come in the mail with a note attached.

I do enjoy the loving relationship I have with the WPS. I am grateful for our endearing union. But the last bit of strange behavior is definitely grounds for breaking up. We’re beyond counselling now.

But I’m sure after a few months, I’ll get a booty call. I’m all they’ve got. Sam and Hairdo are desperate for reconciliation. What would they ever do without my money? Sugah daddies!

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